Oolite Bulletins

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( The notes blatted skyward as they rose  )
( over the Canada geese, feathered rumps  )
( mooning the day, webbed appendages      )
( frantically pedaling unseen bicycles in )
( their search for sustenance, driven by  )
( cruel Nature's maxim, 'Ya wanna eat, ya )
( gotta work,' and at last I knew         )
( Pittsburgh.                             )
(                                         )
( -- Winning sentence, 1987 Bulwer-Lytton )
( bad fiction contest.                    )
 -----------------------------------------
  o
   o
       ___  
     {~._.~}
      ( Y )
     ()~*~()   
     (_)-(_)

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( The Metamorphosis LITE(tm)              )
(                                         )
( -- by Franz Kafka                       )
(                                         )
( A man turns into a bug and his family   )
( gets annoyed.                           )
(                                         )
( Lord of the Rings LITE(tm)              )
(                                         )
( -- by J. R. R. Tolkien                  )
(                                         )
( Some guys take a long vacation to throw )
( a ring into a volcano.                  )
(                                         )
( Hamlet LITE(tm)                         )
(                                         )
( -- by Wm. Shakespeare                   )
(                                         )
( A college student on vacation with      )
( family problems, a screwy               )
(                                         )
( girl-friend and a mother who won't act  )
( her age.                                )
 -----------------------------------------
   o
    o
        .--.
       |o_o |
       |:_/ |
      //   \ \
     (|     | )
    /'\_   _/`\
    \___)=(___/

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/ "... all the modern inconveniences ..." \
|                                         |
\ -- Mark Twain                           /
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  \
   \
       ___  
     {~._.~}
      ( Y )
     ()~*~()   
     (_)-(_)   

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< So you're back... about time... >
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  \
   \   \_\_    _/_/
    \      \__/
           (oo)\_______
           (__)\       )\/\
               ||----w |
               ||     ||

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"This is the element_data structure for elements whose *element_type =
FORM_TYPE_SELECT_ONE, FORM_TYPE_SELECT_MULT. */ /* * nesting deeper
and deeper, harder and harder, go, go, oh, OH, OHHHHH!! * Sorry, got
carried away there. */ struct lo_FormElementOptionData_struct."
                -- Mozilla source code

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< Excellent day to have a rotten day. >
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   \
    \
        .--.
       |o_o |
       |:_/ |
      //   \ \
     (|     | )
    /'\_   _/`\
    \___)=(___/

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Even the clearest and most perfect circumstantial evidence is likely to be at
fault, after all, and therefore ought to be received with great caution.  Take
the case of any pencil, sharpened by any woman; if you have witnesses, you will
find she did it with a knife; but if you take simply the aspect of the pencil,
you will say that she did it with her teeth.
		-- Mark Twain, "Pudd'nhead Wilson's Calendar"

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( Like an expensive sports car,           )
( fine-tuned and well-built, Portia was   )
( sleek, shapely, and gorgeous, her red   )
( jumpsuit moulding her body, which was   )
( as warm as seatcovers in July, her hair )
( as dark as new tires, her eyes flashing )
( like bright hubcaps, and her lips as    )
( dewy as the beads of fresh rain on the  )
( hood; she was a woman driven -- fueled  )
( by a single accelerant -- and she       )
( needed a man, a man who wouldn't shift  )
( from his views, a man to steer her      )
( along the right road: a man like Alf    )
( Romeo.                                  )
(                                         )
( -- Rachel Sheeley, winner               )
(                                         )
( The hair ball blocking the drain of the )
( shower reminded Laura she would never   )
( see her little dog Pritzi again.        )
(                                         )
( -- Claudia Fields, runner-up            )
(                                         )
( It could have been an organically based )
( disturbance of the brain -- perhaps a   )
( tumor or a metabolic deficiency -- but  )
( after a thorough neurological exam it   )
( was determined that Byron was simply a  )
( jerk.                                   )
(                                         )
( -- Jeff Jahnke, runner-up               )
(                                         )
( Winners in the 7th Annual Bulwer-Lytton )
( Bad Writing Contest. The contest is     )
( named after the author of the immortal  )
( lines: "It was a dark and stormy        )
( night." The object of the contest is to )
( write the opening sentence of the worst )
( possible novel.                         )
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  o
   o
       ___  
     {~._.~}
      ( Y )
     ()~*~()   
     (_)-(_)   

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You have the capacity to learn from mistakes.  You'll learn a lot today.

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 ______________________________________
( Q: What's a light-year? A: One-third )
( less calories than a regular year.   )
 --------------------------------------
  o
   o
       ___  
     {~._.~}
      ( Y )
     ()~*~()   
     (_)-(_)   

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Don't read everything you believe.