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People of Zaonce: About my expenses claim...

Posted: Thu May 21, 2009 10:40 pm
by JohnnyBoy
As an elected member of the Zaoncean parliament, I'd like to make a statement about my expenses claim.

I'd first like to make a lame attempt at getting the people of Zaonce to believe that I'm as upset about the expenses system as they are. I want them to know that I hated every minute that I was asking them to pay for my Benoubiweed and Lavean tree grubs. I just can't express how painful it was for me to milk the system for all it was worth.

Of course, none of this would have happened if I hadn't mixed up the receipt for paperclips with the receipt for my Boa Class Cruiser. Silly me. You'd have thought that I would have noticed the 240,000Cr difference between those two items, but accountancy has never been my strong suit. Thankfully, 'lying' has.

I can assure the citizens of Zaonce that I have terminated my subscription to the Riedquatian Adult Channel. They will no longer be asked to pay for such a service -- especially now that I'm so bored of hot Lobstoid action.

All I can say is "Sorry". And then deny any wrong-doing.

Yours Insincerely,
Commander JohnnyBoy, ZMP.

Posted: Thu May 21, 2009 11:27 pm
by MKG
Disgusting.

Unfortunately, there are no neo-fascist systems in Oolite to which I can transfer my allegiance.

Mike

Posted: Fri May 22, 2009 9:11 am
by JohnnyBoy
Well MKG, at least you won't be in the difficult position of having to choose between a bunch of crooks and a bunch of nazis.

You'll just have to vote for the crooks.

Re: People of Zaonce: About my expenses claim...

Posted: Fri May 22, 2009 12:16 pm
by Screet
JohnnyBoy wrote:
As an elected member of the Zaoncean parliament, I'd like to make a statement about my expenses claim.
Hmm. How about a little extra income for law-making favors since you're now running low on money? ;)

Sadly, here in german it were not reporters asking for this, but Telekom. They paid a third party who then gave the money for "speeches" to politicians in order to help them against their competitors.

Although it came out, it appears as nothing is happening to those "politicians".

I guess it would be best to bring all politicians worldwide to a distand island...and then start over with new ones who allow permanent public control over their finances.

Screet

Re: People of Zaonce: About my expenses claim...

Posted: Fri May 22, 2009 1:53 pm
by ClymAngus
The problem has always been that when the democrats are found wanting the opportunistic extremests have a chance to hide their agendas behind the banner of purity.

A dangerous game is being played. On one side personal gain, on the other universal freedom. The electorate need to think long and hard before acting. Something the human race isn't known for.

As a side note I completed my first contract last night. It took 6 goes but this game is giving me balls, I can feel it.

Re: People of Zaonce: About my expenses claim...

Posted: Fri May 22, 2009 2:43 pm
by Diziet Sma
Screet wrote:
I guess it would be best to bring all politicians worldwide to a distand island...and then start over with new ones who allow permanent public control over their finances.

Screet
I guess I'm something of an anarchist at heart... if it were up to me, I'd then nuke the island as an object lesson to anybody else who was even thinking of becoming a politician.. heck, even running for office would be a capital offence. :evil: :twisted:

Politician=Enemy of the people

Re: People of Zaonce: About my expenses claim...

Posted: Fri May 22, 2009 3:08 pm
by Cmdr James
Diziet Sma wrote:
Screet wrote:
I guess it would be best to bring all politicians worldwide to a distand island...and then start over with new ones who allow permanent public control over their finances.

Screet
I guess I'm something of an anarchist at heart... if it were up to me, I'd then nuke the island as an object lesson to anybody else who was even thinking of becoming a politician.. heck, even running for office would be a capital offence. :evil: :twisted:

Politician=Enemy of the people
Not that I disagree especially, but do you have an alternative?

Re: People of Zaonce: About my expenses claim...

Posted: Fri May 22, 2009 3:17 pm
by Screet
Diziet Sma wrote:
I guess I'm something of an anarchist at heart... if it were up to me, I'd then nuke the island as an object lesson to anybody else who was even thinking of becoming a politician.. heck, even running for office would be a capital offence. :evil: :twisted:
I doubt that this would be necessary. Many politicians alone on an island would surely turn life into hell for each other or lead to their extinction anyway. TV reports about the situation there should be more fun ;)

Screet

Posted: Fri May 22, 2009 3:24 pm
by Thargoid
Why do I have the sudden vision of this country importing politicians like it did royalty, and from a similar source?

Posted: Fri May 22, 2009 4:36 pm
by ClymAngus
Thargoid wrote:
Why do I have the sudden vision of this country importing politicians like it did royalty, and from a similar source?
Saxe-Coburg-Gotha? That'll do nicely sir!

Posted: Fri May 22, 2009 4:36 pm
by Azathoth
This whole situation reminds me of something Douglas Adams wrote in the HHGTTG. Cant remember it exactly but it went something like

“the very fact that someone would want to be the president of the Galaxy, makes them ineligible”

Its not restricted to politicians though. I’m sure everyone knows someone who has risen through the ranks in their chosen profession simply because they want to be in charge, not because they deserve it.

Posted: Fri May 22, 2009 6:52 pm
by DaddyHoggy
Azathoth wrote:
This whole situation reminds me of something Douglas Adams wrote in the HHGTTG. Cant remember it exactly but it went something like

“the very fact that someone would want to be the president of the Galaxy, makes them ineligible”

Its not restricted to politicians though. I’m sure everyone knows someone who has risen through the ranks in their chosen profession simply because they want to be in charge, not because they deserve it.
In the military two phrases abound: "You've been promoted to the level of your incompetence" (i.e. General Melchett in Blackadder goes forth) and/or "when dropped into a pond full of big fish it is sometimes the sh*t that floats to the top"

Re: People of Zaonce: About my expenses claim...

Posted: Sat May 23, 2009 4:40 pm
by Diziet Sma
Cmdr James wrote:
Diziet Sma wrote:
Screet wrote:
I guess it would be best to bring all politicians worldwide to a distand island...and then start over with new ones who allow permanent public control over their finances.

Screet
I guess I'm something of an anarchist at heart... if it were up to me, I'd then nuke the island as an object lesson to anybody else who was even thinking of becoming a politician.. heck, even running for office would be a capital offence. :evil: :twisted:

Politician=Enemy of the people
Not that I disagree especially, but do you have an alternative?
Nope...

That's the fun thing about being an Anarchist.. I don't need to offer an alternative... :twisted:

Posted: Sat May 23, 2009 10:45 pm
by DaddyHoggy
I think in HHGTTG - while Zaphod was President all the decisions for the galaxy were made my an old man in a tin shack (Wonko the Sane?)

Posted: Sun May 24, 2009 1:40 am
by _ds_
DaddyHoggy wrote:
I think in HHGTTG - while Zaphod was President all the decisions for the galaxy were made my an old man in a tin shack
For all that I know, that might be true in your universe, but then do you really exist? Who can tell, who can tell…

Ah! A crossword! Or something which looks like what I believe to be one.
(Wonko the Sane?)
Hmm, yes, stuck on that one. Got "_O___IN_".

(Now where's that pencil. I think that I remember putting a pencil down somewhere, but that could just be a fiction to explain why I seem to remember a pencil…)