Oolite Bulletins

When you're flying in deep space, here's some advice to keep you safe
Don't worry: trigger happy
The lanes you see are full of trouble, if you don't act fast they'll give you double
Don't worry: trigger happy

True, true, true, true, true, true, they wanna murder you (don't worry)
But that's what you must do (trigger happy)
You know it's true (don't worry: trigger happy)
True, true, true, true, true, true, they wanna murder you (don't worry)
But that's what you must do (trigger happy)
You know it's true (don't worry: trigger happy)

For if my friend you hesitate, you'll soon be at the pearly gates
Don't worry: trigger happy
You cut the other guy some slack, he'll hit you hard until you crack
Don't worry: trigger happy

True, true, true, true, true, true, they wanna murder you (look at me)
But that's what you must do (I'm trigger happy)
You know it's true (don't worry: trigger happy)
True, true, true, true, true, true, they wanna murder you (here's my number)
But that's what you must do (when you worry, call me)
You know it's true (I'll make you trigger happy)

Pirate asks you drop your cargo? simply drop the laser embargo
Don't worry: trigger happy
Thargoids try to make you glum? q-bomb them all to kingdom come
Don't worry: trigger happy

True, true, true, true, true, true, they wanna murder you (don't worry)
But that's what you must do (trigger happy)
You know it's true (don't worry: trigger happy)
True, true, true, true, true, true, they wanna murder you (don't worry)
But that's what you must do (trigger happy)
You know it's true (don't worry: trigger happy)

Bounty hunter wants your head? couple of hardheads he'll soon be dead
Don't worry: trigger happy
Police patrol targets your ship? energy bomb their ass give them the slip
Don't worry: trigger happy

True, true, true, true, true, true, they wanna murder you (don't worry)
But that's what you must do (they'll soon pass, whoever they are)
You know it's true (you'll make sure they do, with laser fire)
True, true, true, true, true, true, they wanna murder you (don't worry)
But that's what you must do (trigger happy)
You know it's true (don't worry: trigger happy)

Passing trader looks at you funny? bust his hull and make some money
Don't worry: trigger happy
Some joker says that you're a knave? scoop his pod and sell as slaves
Don't worry: trigger happy

True, true, true, true, true, true, they wanna murder you (do I look worried?)
But that's what you must do (I'm not worried)
You know it's true (I'm trigger happy)
True, true, true, true, true, true, they wanna murder you (ain't gonna happen)
But that's what you must do (I'll be 'elite' in no time)
You know it's true (in fact, I'd watch out for me if I were you...)

Redspear wrote:

(in fact, I'd watch out for me if I were you...)

hoqllnq wrote:

The contrast of the lightheartedness of the song versus the harshness of the subject matter.

hoqllnq wrote:

Redspear wrote:

(in fact, I'd watch out for me if I were you...)

..now I worry.

Redspear wrote:

NOT to be taken seriously

Station bound...
Every now and then I get a little bit sleepy
In this mass-lock that I've found

Station bound...
Every now and then I get a little bit bit tired
Overtaking traders drives me to tears

Station bound...
Every now and then I get a little bit nervous
That the rest of all my fuel has expired

Station bound...
Every now and then I get a little bit terrified
And then I see the clock and I die

Station bound - jump drive...
Every now and then I fall apart
Station bound - jump drive...
Every now and then I fall apart

I need injectors now tonight
I need injectors more than ever
If they'd only survived the fight
I'd be speeding on forever
But instead I've been spending the night
Wishing it hadn't gone wrong:

Together we could make it to the end of the lane
But you broke in the first fight I had it's always the same
(Always the same)
I don't know what I'll do if I ever dock at the station
The tech level is too low for me to buy a replacement

I really need injectors tonight
Forever's gonna start tonight
Forever in a mass-lock tonight

Once upon a time
My ship was falling in line
But now it's only falling apart
There's nothing I can do
This Anaconda's a pain in the arse

Once upon a time
I was trading in furs
But now I'm only trading in tears
Nothing I can say
I've hit the liquor/wines and the beers

Diziet Sma wrote:

Several belly-laughs later...

Thanks mate.. I don't think anyone has ever done such a beautiful job of capturing the feeling of being stuck in traffic, without injectors..

Bravo!

Feel Like Trading Goods

Riredi, when I think about you, I think about slugs
Insects, poor industrial, mountain slugs
If I had, one hundred credits, and you were on my way
I would load up, with food cargo, and then make it (make it, make it) make it pay

Feel like tradin'
Feel like tradin' spuds
Feel like tradin' spuds
Feel like tradin' spuds
Feel like tradin' spuds to you


Zaati, when I think about you, I think about grubs
Humans, poor industrial, and tree grubs
If I had, two hundred credits, and could inject all the way
I would load up, with some textiles, and then make it (make it, make it) make it pay

Feel like tradin'
Feel like tradin' rugs
Feel like tradin' rugs
Feel like tradin' rugs
Feel like tradin' rugs to you


If I had, one fearsome ship, iron-assed in every way
I would scoop up, a pack of Thargons, just so I could (I could, I could) I could say

Feel like tradin'
Feel like tradin' bugs
Feel like tradin' bugs
Feel like tradin' bugs
Feel like tradin' bugs to you

Redspear wrote: ↑Wed Apr 19, 2017 12:29 am

OK, so it's getting to the stage where I may need professional help

hoqllnq wrote:

My therapist suggested that writing songs would be .. you know .. therapeutic.

They told me, "Don't think you'll ever make it through Xeer
A bounty on your head, ECM needs repair
Your fuel is just too low and it's dangerous here
So heed it, I'll repeat it:"

"You better run, just as fast as you can
Don't wanna be no good against a missile ram
To inject through the rough better scoop what you can"
Defeat it? What? You gotta be mad

Just cheat it, cheat it, cheat it, cheat it
Open up the file then tweak it
Save-files are easy, change what you like
It doesn't matter, no wrong or right

Just cheat it, cheat it

They're out to get you, any hunter who can
They got you in their sights, now you're a wanted man
You dock like a tool but with computers you can
You'll need it, so cheat it

You have to know it's multi-government here,
These yellow bug-eyed frogs, they really just don't care
They'll shoot you, then they'll scoop you, then sell you at Isceer
Defeat it? Why? You gotta be mad

Just cheat it, cheat it, cheat it, cheat it
Find offending line delete it Load an OXP to beat it
Oolite ain't easy, try as you might
'pinions don't matter, screw forumites

Just cheat it, cheat it
Cheat it, cheat it, cheat it

A long, long time ago
I can still remember how that mining used to make me smile
And I knew if I had my chance
That I could buy a Fer de lance
And maybe it would take me quite a while

But that star jelly made me quiver
With one stray shot I had delivered
Bad news and much more heck
I couldn't even eject

I can't remember if I cried
When watching the radius expanding wide
But plasma burned me deep inside
The day my ship was fried


Oh but why, why, did I really just die?
Weapons offline would have been fine if I'd taken the time
While rock hermits are trading liquor and wines
Saying yes the fuel is priced really high
But ain't nowhere else you can buy


Did I think it would be good
If I traded in illegal goods
Although GalCop tells you no
And did I believe that pitch and roll
Could really save my mortal soul
And was I thinkin' Vipers move real slow

Well, I knew the trouble I was in
When the police said "listen Sonny-Jim"
Cos the interceptor that he flew
Moved faster than bad news

Hit the injectors made the engines buck
But he had them too so I was out of luck
I'd landed in the trumble-muck
The day I couldn't hide


Oh but why, why, did I really just die?
Thought I'm faster, a disaster he's much faster than I
Cos those police boys ain't just enforcing fines
Interceptors where the tech level's high
Can't run where the tech level's high


Now for ten jumps been trading on my own
Not got the cash for furs or gem stones
But that's not how it soon will be
When computers bought instead of machines
And the price of them looks less obscene
I'll have choice to buy furs, luxuries

Oh, but while keeping expenses down
A pirate gave me cause to frown
Four crates or I'd be burned
His offer it was spurned

And when my ship started throwing sparks
My pulse laser it would miss its mark
Couldn't kill him if he was parked
The day my ship expired


I was thinking why, why, did I really just die?
No combat school I was a fool he was swatting a fly
Energy low before I'd opened my fire
Scoopin' any cargo that he could find
Maybe escorts I should have hired


Swelter, swelter fuel scoopin'll melt ya
Heat shielding for just a little shelter
Temperature is rising fast...
I got my tanks full of gass
Turned around trying to save my ass
With the big star on the compass at my back

The cabin air was full of fumes
While injectors failed to play their tune
Awoken from my trance
I wish I'd paid my maintenance

Couldn't escape the gravity field
The mass-lock it refused to yield
The contents of my bowels revealed
The day injectors died


As I was singeing: why, why, am I about to die?
I flew over wasn't nova so I should of been fine
But injectors I forgot they were off-line
Thinkin' I have got a whole lot of time
Shouldn't have wasted all that time


Oh, and when I jumped into witch space
A generation ship I faced
With Thargoids who were closing in
So come on, must be nimble, must be quick
If pilot school taught me a trick
Then, better use it before the end

Oh, and as I closed in to engage
The Thargons launched in fits of rage
My shields they went to hell
I'd soon be there myself

And as I bobbed and weaved throughout the fight
To try to keep out of their sights
Green lasers were firing left and right
Don't pitch before hyperdrive


I was sinkin' why, why, did I really just die?
Ain't to tricky or too picky to fly in a straight line
Just that one rule when using the hyperdrive
And still I screwed it up by pitchin' too high
Screwed it up by pitchin' too high


I met a frog who's skin was blue
And asked for advice I could use
But he just smiled and hopped away
I went down to the fitting store
Where I'd seen the lasers bombs and more
But the frog there said my credits couldn't pay...

And before me, were lasers : beam
Military and mining seemed
That some of them were broken
The folks here all were croakin'

The enemies I despise most
The pirate scum and the Thargoid host
They were the ones killed me the most
The days when I have died


And so I'm singing why, why, when I have a save file?
Simply reload when I explode have another try
Any lobster knows you take a chance when you fly
Thinkin' this could be the day that I die
This could be the day that I die

I keep thinkin' why, why, must I try and retry?
Getting older on my shoulder is the passage of time
But old pilots know that when you fly you're alive
And ain't the dyin' it's the bein' alive

pleiadian wrote:

Reading this with the original tune playing in your head makes it the best cover in this thread so far

pleiadian wrote:

Ooh-ooh I'm a Pleiadian
I'm a little Pleiadian
I'm a Pleiadian taxiing a frog
................

Redspear wrote: ↑Thu Apr 27, 2017 1:34 am

Don M'helmet : The Way That I Fly

pleiadian wrote:

Ooh-ooh I'm a Pleiadian