Oolite Bulletins

After reading some ideas discussed over Switeck's Shipping OXP, got a story idea. Here it is.

Breaker Breaker
Galaxy One
Lave

No matter what, let me be the first to say I SWEAR we aren't terrorists. Your Galcop officers got it all wrong. Those guys fired first. They chose the battlefield. Sure as space is dark, we had no way out and we STILL didn't drop a Q-bomb like we're accused of. That pilot was a pirate, a traitor, and fed information to the PIRATE fleet arrayed against us that day.

What? The beginning? Like you'd even listen!

Fine, for posterity, whatever.

Day one, the first of us had good intentions. We're fresh out of Lave, we're all Galcop born and raised. Our folk were good citizens!... Okay, sure, CAPTAIN John Hawk didn't exactly. Not his fault he grew up on a Rock Hermit. Friggin classist pi - FINE!

So Hawk, Rust and I are just out of Lave, feeling mighty good and proud and wanna celebrate. Riedquat's right near Not the cleanest system but we're fraggin PILOTS now! Yeah, yeah, wet behind the ears, I know that NOW.

So we get to Riedquat, take the straight shot in with a load of cargo, just to pay the tab, eh? We have ourselves a nice drink, SOBER UP, and take off for a little sightseeing. BAM! Pirate attack.

Now back then me and the guys thought we had the thickest patch of 25k of space around. Soons these pirates drop us out we got what looked like a laser gate straight to Presspace. We focus fire on the first guy like any group of idiot friends could and flip around to get our aft away from that hot little zone.

Now Hawk's always been a bit on the stupid brave side. He sticks to his course a few seconds longer and gets the same treatment we gave their pointman, except he's a devious little mind and drops a decoy mine. Knowin him, we knew that either it'd work or he was sunk along with us soon. But that little squad of balloons manages to keep the pirates occupied.

We haul aft back to the station and dock. Hawk's ship is all busted, he's got no cargo left. We say, "Screw it, stick around here, we'll make some quick runs and start pickin those buggers off one at a time for bounty."

Somehow Hawk had managed to not blow his shiny new beam laser. We get a little creative with the wrench and pull it off and mount it on my Cob1. Now we're ready to hunt.

Ya with me so far? Cause that's when we started screwin with pirates, and THEY'RE the ones who brought up that fleet in G8.

Riedquat

So we're hangin around an anarchy, fresh outta Lave. Turns out we all musta been a bit stupid brave, but we're still flyin! We're doin cargo runs back and forth, headin back to Riedquat every few runs or so to put our spare creds towards helpin Hawk get back in the sky. We lased a few bounties but we really couldn't splash many before injecting out. But then we get Hawk airborne.

Three of us are finally all spaceworthy, got a few upgrades. Not Iron-Ass, but we work well enough together to keep one or two pirates from winnin. Startin to build up a nice trophy file between us. Folk start ta notice. One day we're sittin in the Riedquat bar an this trader walks up. Nervous lookin fell, says he's been hounded fer a bit and had to dump most of his last three runs. He says he wants to get outsystem, but might get hit by hitchers. We're feelin mighty friendly at that point and say Sure. We even go a step further. Once we launched we broadcast a message; any traders feelin nervous feel free ta fall in, we're outbound ta Lave. Get another guy comes in alongside; like us he's fresh from Lave, flyin a Cob1. And that's when Rust - big fan of ancient entertainment he is - sounds off "Breaker Breaker, looks like we got ourselves a convoy!"

Enjoying, please continue!

Have added this story to the Oolite Stories page on the wiki.

Rese249er wrote:

And that's when Rust - big fan of ancient entertainment he is - sounds off "Breaker Breaker, looks like we got ourselves a convoy!"

If I was any good at that sort of thing I'd try writing some Ooniverse-themed lyrics to that song. I can't do a Country & Western accent but I can probably do a Dave Lee Travis one.

Jake wrote:

If I was any good at that sort of thing I'd try writing some Ooniverse-themed lyrics to that song. I can't do a Country & Western accent but I can probably do a Dave Lee Travis one.

Go right ahead! I'll even feature them in the story if that's acceptable to you. Next chapter coming soon!

Jake wrote:

Rese249er wrote:

... some Ooniverse-themed lyrics to that song.

Ooniverse-themed lyrics set to old songs... yeah!

Orerve

One thing this trader forgets to mention... He's headed for Orerve. A feudal system. And it got medieval there. We drop outta witchspace and there's this gang of about five there. Trader-boy hauls aft away, leaving me, Rust, Hawk, and the new guy, Efenji, ta deal with em. We manage ta splash three when, sure enough, trader-boy's concerns about a tail comes true. Three more drop out.

By this time we all got thin to none shields, and apparently chances to match. But Giles hang if Hawk didn't pull through. Got pretty hairy for a bit, but Hawk's well-placed Q-bomb managed to solve the problem. He even had the steel in his spine to keep JUST ahead of the cascade and pick up some shiny bounty cred. THEN we notice an escape pod one of the first three to bite it launched. Efenji scoops it, having acquired milgrade injectors somewhere, and we truck it insystem.

The guy in the pod starts mouthin off and yellin bout "unsportsmanlike conduct" when we dock at the main station. Turns out he's some feudal knight or somethin when he's not campin out at the witchpoint to jack workin folk. Suddenly we're all slapped with a summons ta "The Right Hon'rable Court of the Lodge" ta answer charges. Efenji says we got one chance against the charges; call for a trial by duel.

So we launch and pull close to the Lodge, broadcast our request for a duel. Four ships launch, one of em yellin bout no chance of beating a Lord on equal ground. Seeing as we had em in front of us we follow our usual plan of lase em down in turn to start, but the first splash has em all scattering and launching hardheads. Efenji, expecting something like that, musta had his finger on the ECM cause he gave it a quick burst, then another. I trigger mine as I'm closing in on a particularly elaborate ship and manage to take the last few out, then start tearing into my target. He pops a flare and shouts "I give!"

After that, court folk say they're satisfied and send us on our way. But another transmission says the honor of House something-or-other will not stand for this and something about flee to fight another day. We shrug, then I set a course for Zaonce.

Little do we know that slimeball Lord had connects. We all look back on that day and shake our heads at that guy. Seriously, we fight you off and you set off an eight-chart vendetta? Sheesh.

G1: Xexedi

So by the time we get ta the highest-tech systems, we're a little worn down from all the huntin we been up to. Our little convoy seemed to have run into every little piece of pirate turf in the first chart. We're lookin to settle down and cool our hulls, get a maint'nence o'erhaul and knock back a few pints. Suddenly this trader fella we started off with walks up as we're bargaining our ships inta workin shape. Says he and some of his other boys - how in the eight they were his escaped us - were looking ta find newer sights. A galactic jump, he says.

By this time, our little squad and our babysat trader had grown ta include a bit more. Traders and fighters 'ad been fallin inta formation pretty steady since our first convoy call. The bars got a hefty profit when we pulled inta port. Course, even us babysitters had been haulin some cargo here an'ere, so we could afford it easy. 'Ell, most us smaller ships 'ad nothin but liquors to our 'olds when we pulled in.

Point bein', we were practically a whole fleet. Fi'teen strong, six of us with Cobras or summat like. We felt like we could take on the charts. So me, Rust, 'Awk, Fenji, and... ah yes, the lovely ladies. Figured they'd be trouble, but I figured it'd just be a fistfight or two. Yep, Kris and Tal. E'eryone in our little fleet knew that weren't their real name, but nah a one a'us cared.

So the six of us nodded and tipped a glass. I think it was Tal who said, "To new friends." That shoulda tweaked me at the moment, but I 'uz already drunk enough to feel the call o'tha porcelain god.

So Trader... Whuzisname, Yawn, Jahn, whate'er, he runs the rounds next day-shift and goes and fits a galdrive ta 'is ship. We launch, the wormhole opens, we slip through without a pro'lem...

Till we 'it tha other side. Sheer Armageddon...

Loving the voice you're giving to the character. Eagerly awaiting more

G2: Galactic Jumpout

Behind us, the witchpoint buoy. In front, a veritable firestorm of lasers crisscrossed the black. A glance down at my Police IFF showed a great number of flashing red-and-yellow ships entangled in a furball with a group of yellow blips. The scanner lit up behind with more offender blips, probably a reserve force.

I yelled out for a 180 flip. Our freighter wing kept their general bearing, altering their course slightly to reach out into the furball with what weaponry they had. A few utilized aft weapons to lay down a bit of cover fire as my fighter wing came about to intercept the offender force at the cruiser's six.

Rust, Hawk an meself concentrated our fore lasers on one of the front-runners as Efenji and the girls focused on a heavy about 10 klicks beyond. Both targets popped like popcorn, and we switched to a second pair of similar targets before the two lines collided. After that it was a mess of swirling fighters.

The freighter wing had by then helped the clean ships enough that the battle to their side had swung against the pirates. As the battle at the rear raged, the clean ships swept up the offenders to the fore. A message came over the comms.

"Breaker breaker, all clean ships, 249th Naval Reserve thanks you. Coming in to reinforce."

A yellow blip sstarted towards our little patch of firestorm, followed by another four contacts. Afterwards, I learned the lead blip was a Serpent Cruiser and four Cobra 3s painted in a dark pattern. As they came into range, five military lasers reached out to pop three pirates.

With our capable fighter wing backed up by the 249th, we soon had a scanner clear of offender tags. After forming up with the freighter wing, we hailed the Serpent and let him know we were bound insystem and would buy them a drink.

With that rough introduction to Galaxy 2, we set off, ready to sit down at the bar and get our bearings back.

Keep them coming, Rese249er - good reading!

Thanks. When I thought of integrating the 249th, I kinda shied away at first, but decided that, since my self-insert was more of a side character, it wouldn't be TOO egotistical of me.

The 249th sounds cool - it reminds me a little of the Fighting 256th Squadron - two to the fighting eighth power was their motto.

Cody wrote:

Jake wrote:

Rese249er wrote:

... some Ooniverse-themed lyrics to that song.

Ooniverse-themed lyrics set to old songs... yeah!

I know this bit of OoFic has been idle for over a year, but I couldn't resist the challenge. Here's my version of the Oolte-Convoy song (I hope it gets back to Rese249er, but I'll let Cody know it's here if he remembers the thread). Had to keep the handle of 'Rubber Duck' or else the song loses something in the translation.

[On the Comms]
Ah, breaker one-nine, this here's the Rubber Duck. You gotta copy on me, Big Hawk, c'mon? Ah, yeah, 10-4. Rusty? For sure, for sure, by golly, it's clean clear to Riedquat Station, c'mon. Yeah, that's a big 10-4 there, Rusty, yeah, we definitely got the front door, good buddy. Mercy sakes alive, looks like we got us a convoy...

Was the dark-side of the moon on the sixth of June
In a Cobra stackin' ore
Johnny Hawk with a reefer on
As Rusty hauls m’nure
We was headin' for ‘Quat in G-1 so
'Bout a kiloclick out of Lave Town
I says, "Rusty, this here's Rubber Duck.
And I'm about to put the hammer down."

[Chorus]
'Cause we got a little ol' convoy
Blastin' through the night.
Yeah, we got a little ol' convoy,
Ain't she a beautiful sight?
Come on and join our convoy
Ain't nothin' gonna get in our way.
We gonna launch this fraggin' convoy
'Cross the Ooni-Way.
Convoy!
[On the Comms]
Ah, breaker, Rusty, this here's the Duck. You wanna back off a bit? Yeah, 10-4, 'bout five megs or so? Ten, roger – it’s gettin' on the nose up here.

By the time we got our specs all up,
We had a rep as a tight knit force.
Then this flakey guy, says he wants to fly
But them bears was on his ‘xhaust,
Hitchin’ rides and makin’ free,
them pirates weren’t fightin’ fair
We launch, I calls, “This here's the Duck.
"We about to go a-huntin' bear."

[Chorus]
'Cause we got a great big convoy
Blastin' through the night.
Yeah, we got a great big convoy,
Ain't she a beautiful sight?
Come on and join our convoy
Ain't nothin' gonna get in our way.
We gonna launch this fraggin' convoy
'Cross the Ooni-Way.
Convoy!
[On the Comms]
Yeah, punchin’ through with this feller, what’s yer handle? Welcome ‘board, Efenji; you drop back there with Rusty. Yeah, we keep on at him fer toting m’nure a while back – c’n still smell it through the comms!

Well, we jumps right out of witchspace
Into Orerve feudal state.
There waitin’r some hard-nosed reevers
One yellin’ “‘av at thee” in a busted arse Krait.
By the time we hit a few down easy,
Them bears was a-gettin' smart:
They'd brought in some reinforcements
From the wormhole to our rear guard.
There's armored Asps, and Cobs and Kraits,
Rigs of ev'ry size.
Yeah a turkeys nest full've bears
And miss’les filled the skies.
Well, we shot our load and we went for broke
With Hawks well-placed Quirium bomb
Should’ve seen ‘em fall like flies
as he picked up a bounty tonne.
[On the Comms]
Ah, Rubber Duck to Efenji come over. Yeah 10-4 Efenji, you see that micro-bus out yer 8? Yeah, round ‘im up, ‘e might be the one popped out the Krait a ways back.

Well, we laid a strip for the Cor’lis door
And hared off down the line
But I could see the lodge was lined with bears
Gonna slap us with a dog-gone fine.
I says, "Rusty, this here's the Rubber Duck.
Before we’re goin’a get some fuel."
We’ll hafta crash the gate at fifteen twenty-eight
They’re forcin’ us to a duel."

[Chorus]
But we got a mighty convoy
Blastin' through the night.
Yeah, we got a mighty convoy,
Ain't she a beautiful sight?
Come on and join our convoy
Ain't nothin' gonna get in our way.
We gonna fly this fraggin' convoy
'Cross the Ooni-Way.
[On the Comms]
Ah, Efenji, this is Rubber Duck come over? Yeah 10-4 good buddy, can you shut lord Whiner up or I’ll get you to drop ‘im over fer a whiff'v Rusty’s rig?
We was mighty pressed when they all came out
But we held our line with guts
A miss’le salvo launched when closed on in
We eed ‘em all then took the mangy mutts.
The last one yield as he popped a flare
And the court sent us on our way
Lord Whiner’s honour sleight won’t stand for it
Heated threats to fight another day
[Chorus]
But we got a mighty convoy
Blastin' through the night.
Yeah, we got a mighty convoy,
Ain't she a beautiful sight?
Come on and join our convoy
Ain't nothin' gonna get in our way.
We gonna keep this fraggin' convoy
Crossin’ the Ooni-Way.

[On the Comms]
(Convoy!) Ah, 10-4, Rusty, what's your twenty?
(Convoy!) G-2? Well, they oughta know what to do with m’nure out there for sure. Well, mercy (Convoy!) sakes, good buddy, we gonna jump on outta here, so keep the Thargs off your glass and the bears off your... (Convoy!) tail. We'll catch you on the flip-flop. This here's the Rubber Duck in the aether.
Convoy! We gone. 'Bye, 'bye.

@ SteveKing

Now that was impressive!

<wonders what you could do with Dire Straits Money for Nothin'>