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Re: Incursio... is online

Posted: Sun Jul 03, 2011 6:45 pm
by Commander McLane
DaddyHoggy wrote:
I don't mind a passage of time - but Coyote can't say "two weeks?" in response to nothing...
It's in response to something we only read one page later, on p 63:
Bhe gnpgvpny fvzhyngvbaf cerqvpg Ynir jvyy or bireeha va gjb jrrxf.
In other words: it's a scene, we're getting told the end of it first, and then how it came to this end. I have to admit that I was confused about the two weeks at first too, though.

Great story, Drew! :D I vaguely recalled what the first scene was about, and pulled Mutabilis out of the (virtual) shelf in order to find the scene. Very nice tie-in, although it seems now that the Mutabilis epilogue is a little ill-informed. :wink:

Oh, and list of corrigenda underway per PM.

Re: Incursio... is online

Posted: Sun Jul 03, 2011 6:58 pm
by DaddyHoggy
Commander McLane wrote:
DaddyHoggy wrote:
I don't mind a passage of time - but Coyote can't say "two weeks?" in response to nothing...
It's in response to something we only read one page later, on p 63:
Bhe gnpgvpny fvzhyngvbaf cerqvpg Ynir jvyy or bireeha va gjb jrrxf.
In other words: it's a scene, we're getting told the end of it first, and then how it came to this end. I have to admit that I was confused about the two weeks at first too, though.

Great story, Drew! :D I vaguely recalled what the first scene was about, and pulled Mutabilis out of the (virtual) shelf in order to find the scene. Very nice tie-in, although it seems now that the Mutabilis epilogue is a little ill-informed. :wink:

Oh, and list of corrigenda underway per PM.
I got that (eventually) - but it's just odd (sorry Drew), not quite a flash back, not quite a reveal...

Re: Incursio... is online

Posted: Sun Jul 03, 2011 10:30 pm
by Cmdr Wyvern
drew wrote:
Cmdr Wyvern wrote:
He's royally pissed now, the gloves are coming off. It just became personal, and the bugs are gonna pay dearly. If at all possible he'll want to attempt a rescue regardless of risk.

There's Derik's hero moment, Drew. :)
You been reading my plot out-line, Mr. Newt? :lol:

Cheers,

Drew.
:lol: :P Nope!

But I read the story twice, and I know the guy. I created him, y'know.

When someone he cares about is threatened, he reacts with a kind of beserker's rage. All his usual joviality goes *poof*, and a ruthless, relentless, perhaps even slightly demonic dark side comes out, as fearless under fire as a Thargoid.
It's one of the reasons he married Esei, she's the calm to his storm.

So unless his allies manage to talk him out of it, he'll try to rush back and be a knight of deliverance, or an agent of vengeance.

Re: Incursio... is online

Posted: Sun Jul 03, 2011 10:32 pm
by DaddyHoggy
I've just encountered "DaddyHoggy" - hee hee.

(He's not my Daddyhoggy (as Drew pre-warned) but I like him nonetheless!) 8)

(I may have to adopt some of his mannerisms!)

Re: Incursio... is online

Posted: Sun Jul 03, 2011 10:40 pm
by Cody
DaddyHoggy wrote:
(I may have to adopt some of his mannerisms!)
Oh please do... very cool.

Re: Incursio... is online

Posted: Sun Jul 03, 2011 10:48 pm
by Cmdr Wyvern
DaddyHoggy wrote:
I've just encountered "DaddyHoggy" - hee hee.

(He's not my Daddyhoggy (as Drew pre-warned) but I like him nonetheless!) 8)

(I may have to adopt some of his mannerisms!)
I wondered when the Bird traded the poker chips for a library card. :)

Re: Incursio... is online

Posted: Sun Jul 03, 2011 11:34 pm
by Commander McLane
El Viejo wrote:
DaddyHoggy wrote:
(I may have to adopt some of his mannerisms!)
Oh please do... very cool.
And you, would you like a hole in your sombrero? :wink:

Re: Incursio... is online

Posted: Sun Jul 03, 2011 11:36 pm
by Cody
Commander McLane wrote:
And you, would you like a hole in your sombrero?
As a result of those circumstances... most certainly.

Re: Incursio... is online

Posted: Sun Jul 03, 2011 11:54 pm
by Commander McLane
El Viejo wrote:
Commander McLane wrote:
And you, would you like a hole in your sombrero?
As a result of those circumstances... most certainly.
What about this?
Image

Re: Incursio... is online

Posted: Sun Jul 03, 2011 11:59 pm
by Cody
Thank you, McLane... implemented. I will need another tooth extracted shortly, too... heh.

Re: Incursio... is online

Posted: Mon Jul 04, 2011 12:06 am
by DaddyHoggy
Finished!

Can't wait until Christmas! Write Faster!!!

Found these - Disembodied will be more thorough no doubt!

Incursio

page 126 - "troupe" not "troup"
page 135 - "troupe" not "troup"
page 149 - Scan my companion and add their profile (singular to plural)
page 150 - emerging into the core (I think you emerge *from* something)
page 224 - " During the course of a couple of days a series of..." (not days - hours - after all they were only stopping for five hours)

Re: Incursio... is online

Posted: Mon Jul 04, 2011 12:09 am
by DaddyHoggy
Cmdr Wyvern wrote:
DaddyHoggy wrote:
I've just encountered "DaddyHoggy" - hee hee.

(He's not my Daddyhoggy (as Drew pre-warned) but I like him nonetheless!) 8)

(I may have to adopt some of his mannerisms!)
I wondered when the Bird traded the poker chips for a library card. :)
Of course, I could be engaged in bluff and double bluff, I have, after all, done many things, many of which have yet to be recounted, and many more that never will...

Re: Incursio... is online

Posted: Mon Jul 04, 2011 5:03 am
by Cmd. Cheyd
Pg. 56 (PDF) "The lizard strode across to her, covering the distance in a few strides."

Re: Incursio... is online

Posted: Mon Jul 04, 2011 6:10 am
by drew
El Viejo wrote:
DaddyHoggy wrote:
(I may have to adopt some of his mannerisms!)
Oh please do... very cool.
I saw him as a sort of 'Sir Humphrey" of the Avian world... :D My favourite bit is where Hesperus rounds on him and says "Define restricted." .... so Daddyhoggy does!
Daddyhoggy wrote:
Finished!

Can't wait until Christmas! Write Faster!!!
Won't get back to Finis until September. Finishing this in the next two months, then hols, then back to the Saga...
Image
Ha ha! Priceless, and on the left hand side too, good observation skills there Commander McLane!

Cheers,

Drew.

Re: Incursio... is online

Posted: Mon Jul 04, 2011 7:39 am
by Commander McLane
drew wrote:
Image
Ha ha! Priceless, and on the left hand side too, good observation skills there Commander McLane!
I have to confess that I didn't actually care about the side, I placed it just because of the black backdrop. :wink: