Cheers, Hetetics wheeze of using looping has increased the variety in all parts of the message alot! I've broken the cool_items into things and people:- "wanted for stealing my daughters chemistry set" as against "charged with teasing the Laveian President's Bruce Willis clone".
Code: Select all
<key>assassination_board_part2</key>
<array>
<string>[assassination_board_crime] tax evasion,</string>
<string>and known cat juggler,</string>
<string>[assassination_board_crime] spamming bulletin boards,</string>
<string>seen urinating outside a public convenience,</string>
<string>[assassination_board_crime] moral turpitude,</string>
<string>[assassination_board_crime] imagining the death of a monarch,</string>
<string>[assassination_board_crime] persistent breaches of docking regulations,</string>
<string>who failed to read the small print on the organ-donor card,</string>
<string>[assassination_board_crime] illegal chimp dumping,</string>
<string>[assassination_board_crime] chump dumping without a licence,</string>
<string>[assassination_board_crime] Umpty-bagging,</string>
<string>and known organ-legger,</string>
<string>[assassination_board_crime] crimes against reality,</string>
<string>[assassination_board_crime] passing the Maleveian Lethal Brandy counter-spinwards,</string>
<string>[assassination_board_crime] criminal food-blending,</string>
<string>[assassination_board_crime] docking violations too numerous to mention,</string>
<string>and third-degree solipsist,</string>
<string>[assassination_board_crime] lese majeste,</string>
<string>seen whistling on a Tuesday,</string>
<string>and known Thargoid sympathiser,</string>
<string>[assassination_board_crime] committing unnatural acts with a Thargoid,</string>
<string>whose library books are overdue,</string>
<string>and repeated abuser of medicinal megaweed,</string>
<string>and convicted shrew-rustler,</string>
<string>and peddler of vapourware,</string>
<string>[assassination_board_crime] numerous petty criminal acts,</string>
<string>[assassination_board_crime] trading in illegal goods,</string>
<string>[assassination_board_crime] making anti-crustacean remarks,</string>
<string>[assassination_board_crime] breach of contract,</string>
<string>[assassination_board_crime] playing with marked cards,</string>
<string>who has the death sentence on twelve systems,</string>
<string>[assassination_board_crime] grand theft astro across the galaxies,</string>
<string>and witness in an important case,</string>
<string>who didn't know when to fold playing cards with legitimate business beings,</string>
<string>and minion who knows too much,</string>
<string>and suspected Spartacus Brotherhood sympathiser,</string>
<string>and slave trading low-life,</string>
<string>whose death is required in the interests of GalCop,</string>
<string>[assassination_board_crime] non-payment of fines,</string>
<string>[assassination_board_crime] causing a total existence failure in the Sol System,</string>
<string>[assassination_board_crime] smuggling battle weapons across systems,</string>
<string>[assassination_board_crime] smuggling trumbles across systems,</string>
<string>and known member of the Knights who say Ni,</string>
<string>suspected heretic against the Church of Giles,</string>
<string>[assassination_board_crime] feeding beings to ravenous Bug Blatter Beasts,</string>
<string>[assassination_board_crime] crimes against the Laws of Time,</string>
<string>[assassination_board_crime] cruelty to trumbles,</string>
<string>[assassination_board_crime] numerous violations of Galactic Health and Safety Law,</string>
<string>has earned the right to be treated with extreme prejudice. The victim, currently</string>
<string>and rotten narcotics trader,</string>
<string>and ordinary trader,</string>
<string>and well known pirate,</string>
<string>and Minister of the Unholy Church of the Supreme Anti-Giles,</string>
<string>and pesky union agitator,</string>
<string>[assassination_board_crime] impregnating two felines and running away,</string>
<string>[assassination_board_crime] causing the loss of a passenger liner with a cargo container contaminated with trumbles,</string>
<string>last seen</string>
<string>and member of the Smugglers Guild,</string>
<string>and member of the local commercial athenaeum,</string>
<string>[assassination_board_crime] selling trade secrets,</string>
<string>and treacherous employee of Griff Research Ltd,</string>
<string>and dubious ex-employee of Heretic Shipyards Ltd,</string>
<string>and foul-smelling, grog-swilling blackguard,</string>
<string>must be dispatched with the utmost urgency for the common good. The mark, believed to be</string>
<string>[assassination_board_crime] the planning and preparation of aggressive war,</string>
<string>[assassination_board_crime] conspiracy to commit crimes against felinity,</string>
<string>[assassination_board_crime] inciting lobstoid identity theft,</string>
<string>[assassination_board_crime] solicitation to commit malfeasance in public office,</string>
<string>[assassination_board_crime] arson aboard an orbital space station,</string>
<string>[assassination_board_crime] thought crime whilst docked in a Communist system,</string>
<string>[assassination_board_crime] attempted blackmail of a GalCop Officer,</string>
<string>[assassination_board_crime] embezzlement from Communist Party funds,</string>
<string>[assassination_board_crime] piracy and murder,</string>
<string>know to have caused unnecessary suffering to a Weeviloid,</string>
<string>[assassination_board_crime] having caused unnecessary suffering to small harmless rodents,</string>
<string>[assassination_board_crime] littering,</string>
<string>[assassination_board_crime] jayspacewalking,</string>
<string>[assassination_board_crime] personality theft,</string>
<string>[assassination_board_crime] brainjacking,</string>
<string>who removed the "do not remove" label from a mattress,</string>
<string>[assassination_board_crime] contravening the Being Bloody Stupid Act of 1581,</string>
<string>[assassination_board_crime] being too clever by half,</string>
<string>who we really, really don't like,</string>
<string>who has a very ugly sister,</string>
<string>and all-round unpleasant individual,</string>
<string>whose sibling looked at me funny once,</string>
<string>[assassination_board_crime] having a real life,</string>
<string>and tele-sales being of ill repute,</string>
<string>[assassination_board_crime] smelling of cabbage in a public place,</string>
<string>[assassination_board_crime] transmitting irrational communications,</string>
<string>[assassination_board_crime] irradiating a mallard on a Sunday,</string>
<string>[assassination_board_crime] taking pot-shots at [assassination_board_poster_systemd] Station,</string>
<string>last seen in possesion of an illegal foodblender,</string>
<string>[assassination_board_crime] the illegal re-sale of defective slaves,</string>
<string>[assassination_board_crime] sentient carnivory,</string>
<string>[assassination_board_crime] copyright infringement,</string>
<string>[assassination_board_crime] quantum disruption of the time-line,</string>
<string>[assassination_board_crime] breaching a Judicial Order to clean up after the craboids,</string>
<string>who etch-a-sketched a crude rude image of The Lord Giles,</string>
<string>and notorious Witchspace Lobster worshiper,</string>
<string>who utterly displeases the Happy Eye,</string>
<string>who disturbed [random_hits_cool_item_owner] mid-morning nap,</string>
<string>and strike breaking scab,</string>
<string>who forged zero-G Hockey Galactic Cup tickets,</string>
<string>who has defaced Ad-X property,</string>
<string>and escapee from an Astrogulag,</string>
<string>who robbed a Pi-47 convenience store,</string>
<string>who missed an important penalty shot,</string>
<string>who spreads Mad Avian Disease,</string>
<string>and vacuum karate black belt,</string>
<string>and former Space Rickshaw pilot,</string>
<string>and recent Looto winner,</string>
<string>who transported a feline to Esisor,</string>
<string>and hot Thoraxxx Twister show performer,</string>
<string>who claims to have seen Orbs,</string>
<string>and undaunted guerrilla plumber,</string>
<string>[assassination_board_crime] selling hazardous xenoforms without a permit,</string>
<string>[assassination_board_crime] smoking mega-weed without a prescription,</string>
<string>[assassination_board_crime] trading in defective snake-oil,</string>
<string>[assassination_board_crime] uttering the word 'Belgium' in a public place,</string>
<string>[assassination_board_crime] breaking the rules of acquisition,</string>
<string>and corrupt croupier,</string>
<string>[assassination_board_crime] inciting the Dice Life across the Galaxies,</string>
<string>who failed to repay a loan,</string>
<string>[assassination_board_crime] ramming the [assassination_board_poster_systemd]ian Navigational Beacon,</string>
<string>and suspected member of 'The Link' insurgent group,</string>
<string>who failed to attend attitude adjustment class,</string>
<string>who failed to clean groigoid-droppings from [assassination_board_poster_systemd] Station flightdeck,</string>
<string>[assassination_board_crime] taking Giles' name in vain,</string>
<string>[assassination_board_crime] infecting [assassination_board_poster_systemd] with the Black Death,</string>
<string>[assassination_board_crime] cursing in a Zenarchy Monastery,</string>
<string>who made Grandma Thruttle really angry,</string>
<string>who fell asleep watching an exciting [assassination_board_poster_systemd]ian sit com,</string>
<string>[assassination_board_company]</string>
<string>[assassination_board_company]</string>
<string>[assassination_board_company]</string>
<string>thought to possess [random_hits_cool_item],</string>
<string>[assassination_board_crime] stealing [random_hits_cool_item],</string>
<string>rumoured to be in possession of [random_hits_cool_item],</string>
<string>who recently acquired [random_hits_cool_item] in suspicious circumstances,</string>
<string>[assassination_board_crime] criminal use of [random_hits_cool_item],</string>
<string>[assassination_board_crime] vandalising [random_hits_cool_item],</string>
<string>[assassination_board_crime] selling [random_hits_cool_item] without permission,</string>
<string>[assassination_board_crime] illegal possession of [random_hits_cool_item],</string>
<string>[assassination_board_crime] setting fire to [random_hits_cool_item],</string>
<string>[assassination_board_crime] attempted theft of [random_hits_cool_item],</string>
<string>[assassination_board_crime] conspiracy to steal [random_hits_cool_item],</string>
<string>[assassination_board_crime] unauthorised use of [random_hits_cool_item],</string>
<string>[assassination_board_crime] deliberately damaging [random_hits_cool_item],</string>
<string>[assassination_board_crime] urinating on [random_hits_cool_item],</string>
<string>[assassination_board_crime] making off with [random_hits_cool_item],</string>
<string>[assassination_board_crime] looking covetously at [random_hits_cool_item],</string>
<string>[assassination_board_crime] looking sideways at [random_hits_cool_item],</string>
<string>whom the [assassination_board_poster_systemd]ian authorities believe to have recently acquired [random_hits_cool_item],</string>
<string>who stole [random_hits_cool_item],</string>
<string>who vandalised [random_hits_cool_item],</string>
<string>who set fire to [random_hits_cool_item],</string>
<string>who deliberately damaged [random_hits_cool_item],</string>
<string>who urinated on [random_hits_cool_item],</string>
<string>who made off with [random_hits_cool_item],</string>
<string>who covets [random_hits_cool_item],</string>
<string>who attempted to steal [random_hits_cool_item],</string>
<string>who conspired to steal [random_hits_cool_item],</string>
<string>who destroyed [random_hits_cool_item],</string>
<string>who wreaked [random_hits_cool_item],</string>
<string>who broke [random_hits_cool_item],</string>
<string>who sold [random_hits_cool_item] without permission,</string>
<string>who ruined [random_hits_cool_item],</string>
<string>who lost [random_hits_cool_item],</string>
<string>who looked sideways at [random_hits_cool_item],</string>
<string>[assassination_board_crime] kidnapping [random_hits_cool_item2],</string>
<string>[assassination_board_crime] abducting [random_hits_cool_item2],</string>
<string>[assassination_board_crime] teasing [random_hits_cool_item2],</string>
<string>[assassination_board_crime] cruelty towards [random_hits_cool_item2],</string>
<string>[assassination_board_crime] eating [random_hits_cool_item2],</string>
<string>[assassination_board_crime] torturing [random_hits_cool_item2],</string>
<string>who kidnapped [random_hits_cool_item2],</string>
<string>who abducted [random_hits_cool_item2],</string>
<string>who teased [random_hits_cool_item2],</string>
<string>who was cruel towards [random_hits_cool_item2],</string>
<string>who eat [random_hits_cool_item2],</string>
<string>who tortured [random_hits_cool_item2],</string>
</array>
<key>assassination_board_company</key>
<array>
<string>of [assassination_board_poster_systemd] Metal Works Incorporated,</string>
<string>of [assassination_board_poster_systemd] Liquors and Wines Ltd,</string>
<string>of [assassination_board_poster_systemd] Foam Metals Ltd,</string>
<string>of [assassination_board_poster_systemd] Farm Machinery Ltd,</string>
<string>of the Arexeian Broadcasting Corporation,</string>
<string>of the Sirius Corporation,</string>
<string>of the Nakashimi Corporation,</string>
<string>of Salient Enterprises Ltd,</string>
<string>of the Rigel Cartel,</string>
<string>of Ramon Security Ltd,</string>
<string>of Soin Classic Shipyards,</string>
<string>of Aegis Secoority,</string>
<string>of Sirius Cybernetics Incorporated,</string>
</array>
<key>assassination_board_crime</key>
<array>
<string>wanted for</string>
<string>suspected of</string>
<string>guilty of</string>
<string>indicted for</string>
<string>convicted of</string>
<string>convicted in absentia of</string>
<string>charged with</string>
<string>currently on the run for</string>
</array>
<key>random_hits_cool_item</key>
<array>
<string>[random_hits_cool_item_owner] foodblender</string>
<string>[random_hits_cool_item_owner] antique flintlock pistol</string>
<string>[random_hits_cool_item_owner] copper golem</string>
<string>[random_hits_cool_item_owner] underwear</string>
<string>[random_hits_cool_item_owner] valuable silver surfboard</string>
<string>[random_hits_cool_item_owner] broccoli plant</string>
<string>[random_hits_cool_item_owner] copy of Elite 4</string>
<string>[random_hits_cool_item_owner] rubber chicken</string>
<string>[random_hits_cool_item_owner] finest turnip</string>
<string>[random_hits_cool_item_owner] very well cured Corsicoid cheese</string>
<string>[random_hits_cool_item_owner] unbelievably sharp katana sword</string>
<string>the Holy Hand Grenade of Antioch</string>
<string>the [assassination_board_poster_systemd]ian Sceptre of Authority</string>
<string>[random_hits_cool_item_owner] copy of the Federal Times</string>
<string>[random_hits_cool_item_owner] copy of the Imperial Herald</string>
<string>[random_hits_cool_item_owner] very funny hat</string>
<string>[random_hits_cool_item_owner] favourite [assassination_board_poster_systemd]ian bowtie</string>
<string>[random_hits_cool_item_owner] compromising piece of underwear</string>
<string>[random_hits_cool_item_owner] chemistry set</string>
<string>[random_hits_cool_item_owner] deadly cream pie</string>
<string>[random_hits_cool_item_owner] collection of bad jokes</string>
<string>[random_hits_cool_item_owner] shipment of hi-tech military hardware</string>
<string>[random_hits_cool_item_owner] copy of Baudelaire's 'Fleurs du Mal'</string>
<string>[random_hits_cool_item_owner] antique copy of Poe's anthology</string>
<string>[random_hits_cool_item_owner] canister of Soholian Plague virus</string>
<string>[random_hits_cool_item_owner] brand new combat computer</string>
<string>[random_hits_cool_item_owner] devilishly ingenious auto-target system</string>
<string>[random_hits_cool_item_owner] prized set of bagpipes</string>
<string>[random_hits_cool_item_owner] bank of Aegis Suprema shield generators</string>
<string>[random_hits_cool_item_owner] brand new 4MW beam laser</string>
<string>[random_hits_cool_item_owner] collection of military missiles</string>
<string>[random_hits_cool_item_owner] original Masamune katana sword</string>
<string>[random_hits_cool_item_owner] fully functional scale model of the Ark of Alliance</string>
<string>[random_hits_cool_item_owner] Playsentient holo-cube</string>
<string>[random_hits_cool_item_owner] top of the range vacuum cleaner</string>
<string>[random_hits_cool_item_owner] bottle of 75% proof puncheon rum</string>
<string>[random_hits_cool_item_owner] treasured mass projectile railgun</string>
<string>[random_hits_cool_item_owner] state of the art laser cooling system</string>
<string>[random_hits_cool_item_owner] beloved asteroid plough</string>
<string>[random_hits_cool_item_owner] prized Valkyrie laser array</string>
<string>[random_hits_cool_item_owner] copy of 'How to Conquer the Ooniverse in 30 Easy Lessons'</string>
<string>[random_hits_cool_item_owner] artificial leg</string>
<string>[random_hits_cool_item_owner] wooden false teeth</string>
<string>[random_hits_cool_item_owner] dead trumble on a spring</string>
<string>[random_hits_cool_item_owner] glow in the dark OmniDeity</string>
<string>[random_hits_cool_item_owner] vibrating pilot's chair</string>
<string>[random_hits_cool_item_owner] pint of Riedquatian Brown Ale</string>
<string>[random_hits_cool_item_owner] sonic screwdriver</string>
<string>[random_hits_cool_item_owner] psychic paper</string>
<string>[random_hits_cool_item_owner] robotic dog</string>
<string>[random_hits_cool_item_owner] Rupert Bear Annual</string>
<string>[random_hits_cool_item_owner] blue and white striped golfing umbrella</string>
<string>[random_hits_cool_item_owner] election manifesto</string>
<string>[random_hits_cool_item_owner] machine that goes 'ping'</string>
<string>[random_hits_cool_item_owner] vulcanized rubber glove</string>
<string>[random_hits_cool_item_owner] stash of medicinal mega-weed</string>
<string>[random_hits_cool_item_owner] Airfix model of [assassination_board_poster_systemd] Station</string>
<string>[random_hits_cool_item_owner] antique Jake Thackray compact disc</string>
<string>[random_hits_cool_item_owner] last will and testament</string>
<string>[random_hits_cool_item_owner] treasured Happy Eye Pulpit Pod</string>
<string>[random_hits_cool_item_owner] sacred relics of the Witchspace Lobster</string>
<string>[random_hits_cool_item_owner] brand new Terascreen</string>
</array>
<key>random_hits_cool_item2</key>
<array>
<string>[random_hits_cool_item_owner] Bruce Willis clone</string>
<string>[random_hits_cool_item_owner] copper golem</string>
<string>[random_hits_cool_item_owner] Chuck Norris clone</string>
<string>[random_hits_cool_item_owner] cute tabby kitten</string>
<string>[random_hits_cool_item_owner] rare albino trumble</string>
<string>[random_hits_cool_item_owner] hard pinching pet lobster</string>
<string>[random_hits_cool_item_owner] libel lawyer</string>
<string>[random_hits_cool_item_owner] lovely looking bodyguard</string>
<string>[random_hits_cool_item_owner] personal fitness instructor</string>
<string>[random_hits_cool_item_owner] favorite accountant</string>
<string>[random_hits_cool_item_owner] cocker spaniel</string>
<string>[random_hits_cool_item_owner] loyal guinea pig</string>
<string>[random_hits_cool_item_owner] pedigree rabbit</string>
<string>[random_hits_cool_item_owner] hard working nurse</string>
<string>[random_hits_cool_item_owner] beloved</string>
</array>
<key>random_hits_cool_item_owner</key>
<array>
<string>my</string>
<string>my daughter's</string>
<string>my mother's</string>
<string>my hatchling's</string>
<string>my uncle's</string>
<string>my son's</string>
<string>my cousin's</string>
<string>my auntie's</string>
<string>my father's</string>
<string>my nephew's</string>
<string>my brother's</string>
<string>my sister's</string>
<string>my grandmother's</string>
<string>my grandfather's</string>
<string>the [assassination_board_poster_systemd]ian President's</string>
<string>[assassination_board_poster_titled] [assassination_board_poster_named]'s</string>
<string>the [assassination_board_poster_systemd]ian Chief Tax Inspector's</string>
<string>the [assassination_board_poster_systemd]ian Police Chief's</string>
</array>
